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2005/02/02

well… basically… what am i here for today? A whole load of thoughts… about life all this while…

at lunch today… we were basically eating at the canteen and Carol was telling me… again the same thing which she told me back last semster… -> to control my retraction of words…

basically… i didn’t really bother if you ask me… why? simply put it this way… I had enough and had already been trying to keep my mouth shut… however, it just isn’t possible given that she keeps volunterring me out during class whenever the lecturer needs someone to volunteer… since then… (no offcence…. just stating my facts) i have took the cue and I just spoke up after the lecturer got to me and i just speak out what my point of views are… just as simple as that. basically… as it seems many feel that I’m a paranoid for answering all the questions… i understand how it feels… but, the class is rather quiet at times when a question is posed to them… I’m just doing my best to help in answering… just like back in JYSS…. Whenever Ms Quek asks us to speak up… only a few brave souls dare speak up… and the irony is happening here… for 1 semester… I know that i have been a loud haler… now that i want to have a break… there seems like no one want to give me a break… so i end up taking the loud header again… with honour to deliver my speech… this time… with more power just like in Julius Caesar… the fact is… I’m playing the role of Anthony… not that i had wanted to speak… it is under the stress that people want to volunteer me… not that i want to volunteer myself… i just play along…

the irony in itself is she suddenly apologies to me out of the blue left me speechless and stunned… and i just simply shrug it off… I will not under such circumstances accept the apology. Firstly… u did not do anything wrong and i doubt that I deserve to get any apologies… well… every comment of your just seems like drinking plain water to me… and as for your suddenly departure… it just seems wierd and I have got nothing to say either. As for whether hanafi is speaking on my behalf… i don’t know and don’t bother… my view of life has changed a whole lot ever since my aunt passed away in May 2002… I should say… i realise how fragile life is and won’t think so much about dying… if i have to die… i will die… just to speak abit about the spoofy incident recently… It could have been the lack of seriousness that aroused the souls of the other land… and I did say that… we will die one day… that is a fact… a fact no one can change… unless you clone yourself… or you were to take an immortal pill… if that ever exists.

enough said, i left school after Bio lecture, skipped Bio Lab coz I needed a breather…and decided to bring forward my appointment with Jasmine to go shopping with her to select a gift for her Bf’s birthday… Met her a little earler… went for lunch then headed over to TM, couldn’t find anything interesting, then headed to parkway parade to order a cake and select a present. Decided upon finger wax, she made one with her right hand i think… as a present for her bf. then we left… I slept on my journey back… real tired for a day like this.

for those who are not happy or feels that they would like to comment about this post… feel free to make a comment by clicking on the comment link. Would love to hear your views 🙂

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